The Brendan Courtney Show & XXI with Ze Germans

Monday 28th November 2005, 4.50pm, sitting in a Management Accounting tutorial in Áras an Phiarsaig. The anticipation of a pint in McDaid's with Fi, Lenny and his mates is giving me the jitters. No sooner had our lecturer uttered his closing remarks about Product Specific Activity Based Costing than I was out the door and tearing up Grafton St in the general direction of McDaid's. Lenny, GayOrg and Stefan were clearly already in high spirits no doubt due to the early commencement of the drinking session. After one swift pint, myself, Col and Fi left for Howl at the Moon where the Brendan Courtney Show was being filmed, via McDonald's for a quick fix of the old reliable eurosaver menu. We met Emsy in the queue outside eating a bag of popcorn. Unfortunately the chemical properties of the popcorn caused her tongue piercing to fall out on not one but two occasions! Lucky good ol' Grum was there to screw it back in.

On our way in we were each given a free drinks voucher. After arguing with the woman giving them out it looked for a brief second like I might get a second voucher! Alas in the end it was not to be however since Emsy wasn't drinking I was able to buy hers for the price of an orange juice. We were sitting in the bar area with our drinks waiting for the show to begin filming and just as I ordered my second we were all told to finish up our drinks and head upstairs to where it was being filmed. Bloody typical. Knocked back the drink and headed upstairs. The room was very small and only stools to sit on so not the most comfortable of situations however definitely acceptable. The warm up guy (Brendan's brother?!) was great however my larynx suffered severely from all the cheering practice. Finally Brendan appeared and the show got underway. It was hard work laughing hard at the jokes when sometimes they were only mildly amusing or not funny at all. The guests were a gardener, a chef and a TV presenter. Good craic but was well in need of a drink by the end which came only after multiple takes of Brendan's entrance.

Leaving Howl at the Moon we headed for Doyles to meet up with the Germans who were just leaving Abracadabra! No secret was made of the fact that they had been eating garlic fries. After a few in Doyles we migrated over to XXI, formerly Coyote Lounge. A fiver in and €3 drinks all night. It was here that things got messy. We took control of a booth consisting of soft couches and a small yet remarkably sturdy table in the middle for drinks. (See photos below) Fi somehow discovered the joys of spinning on one's head and was eager for everyone else to join in. This had inevitable consequences and the resulting carnage can be seen below. Another mission of Fi's was to run her fingers through the back of Leopold's soft silky hair and employed various somewhat unorthodox methods of doing so producing hilarious results.

Kicked out at closing time, myself and Fi ended up in Charlie's 3 for some delicious Chinese cuisine. Leaving Charlie's we swiftly obtained a taxi and steered in the direction of 30 priory grove. As always, a picture paints a thousand words so I'll leave it to the pics below to fill in the gaps.






















































































Now away with ye...

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

Went to the match (Ireland V Romania) with Emsy hammer and Col. A lift in from Fleur(?!) and a pair of breakfast baps from Spar before meeting Emsy and heading down to the stadium. It being Emsy's first visit to Lansdowne Rd for a sporting event (Although some would consider Robbie Williams a sporting event!) she was on top form bangin out some classic one-liners. The only one I can remember was in reference to Kieran Campbell when he tackled a rather large Romanian forward: "Well done, little man!" Perhaps Col could enlighten us with a few more? Emsy also reckons that Ronan OGara must never get constipation from constantly squatting the way he does. One can only wonder what Emsy smokes for breakfast.

Thanks to another lift from the lovely Fleur(?!) myself and Col arrived at Emsy hammer's around 9pm heavily armed with Bavaria and WKD blue. After some friendly banter with her and Clare over some 6month old Indian takeaway and a bowl of popcorn we retired to the front room to watch the exorcism of yer one Emily Rose. Nothing much else happened between then and goin home save some more excellent lines from Emsy and Clare, none of which I can remember! Col - help me out here again! Clare did, however, make out with the video player. Not a particularly exciting entry for the blog but included for completion and clarity.

Now away with ye...

Rob's 21st

It is amazing how much work you can actually get done when you put your mind to it - and when you have a bottle of red wine at your disposal! This held true for me last night as I found myself sitting in the computer rooms of the TCD Statistics Department working on my final year project accompanied by a glass (Sorry - paper cup) of Redser's dodgy Californian wine. I have never worked so efficiently before in my life and as such am eager to try this method again soon. Anyway as the deadline for the 7.30 bus to Ballyboden drew alarmingly close, myself, Si and Redser decided it was finally time to leave and meet Niall and Pamela for the treacherous journey into the sticks. This, of course, had nothing at all to do with the recent calls from Pamela at two minute intervals wondering where the hell we were and when we were going to head to the bus stop. No journey to the bus stop would be complete without a stop off at Centra for supplies of Bushmills whiskey, Bavaria and Airwaves. Fully stocked, we proceeded to meet the others. Dublin Bus being Dublin Bus, the 49 was inevitabely late. Despite much worrying on Pamela's behalf and much insistance from Redser to head to O'Neill's for a quick one, we managed to all board the bus. The journey was somewhat uneventful save Blathnaids new friendship with a drunk old Northern Irish bloke at the back of the bus.

We were the first to arrive at the venue - St. Enda's GAA club in Ballyboden. The place filled up soon enough and eventually the food appeared much to the relief of a starving MSISS class. Chicken, chips and salad and a shit load of buttered bread - brown and white! This was followed by a medley of 70s tunes by Rob's two Uncles on keyboards and drums respectively. It was then that I was invited on stage by Rob's younger brother to play bass on a few numbers. DISASTER! I was managing alright for the first couple till we started to play Sunshine of your Love. Thinking I was sorted because I knew the song I launched into it with great enthusiasm. It was only towards the end of the song that I heard someone calling my name. I turned around - it was Rob's keyboard playing Uncle. What was he saying? I couldn't make it out above the din! Why was he saying "It's Indie! It's Indie!"?? *click* He's saying "It's in D, It's in D!" I looked down at my bass and realised with horror that I had been playing the song in E all this time and the din I was hearing was a result of my error. TOTAL 'MARE! I finished out the song in a pathetic attempt to switch to E and then quietly left the stage never to return again. Apologies to Rob's brothers who are both very talented musicians for polluting their performance with my crass mistake.

A few drinks later I had forgotten the disaster and was back on top form again. Happy Birthday, 21 kisses and birthday cake inevitabely ensued followed by much dancing. Rob, revelling in the merriment, was on flying form and managed to pull almost everybody up for a good aul dance climaxing with everybody joined in a big ring for the only song to finish a night off with - I'm gonna be (500 miles) by The Proclaimers! We left shortly after that to head to town but not before pointing out that the baby photos of Rob at the door bore a striking resemblance to a certain Departmental lecturer. All fired up for going into town, I stopped outside to give a randomer directions which was strange since I had no idea where I was myself! Turning around, EVERYONE else had left in a car! Bastads. Fine then. Didn't want to go to town with them anyway. Spotted a lone figure across the road trying to hail a taxi and upon further inspection it turned out to be Will. Good old Will.

We got a taxi together and ended up at the bottom of Cornelscourt hill. With the taxi already at 20 big ones, I decided to get out there and walk the rest. It was then I realised my proximity to Col's gaff and felt obliged to inform him of this via Short Message Sending courtesy of o2. Passing Dunnes and resisting the temptation to go in and buy roast turkey and a dvd, I arrived home around 2am. With an extra ticket to the Ireland V Romania match resting in my breast pocket, I stumbled into my parents' room and mumbled something to my Dad about did he want to come to the match. He didn't. Got into bed but not before I had a quick drunken chat with Col and Frances on MSN. Well I had a good two-way chat with Frances however the chat with Col was positively one-way and I was reminded as such on more than one occasion the following day. Getting into bed, I watched a third of the Brendan Courtney show from last Wednesday night before slipping into a deep, alcohol induced sleep.

Now away with ye...

Col's account of UCD row row row your boat ball

Complete with original typos!

emsy was half and hour late up to the daniel day luas stop so i was waiting up there in my tux and getting the strangest looks from all the 15 year old who were coming back from town .. im pretty sure i was in there. then got to some house in raneligh and was good craic, cept we were so late that we didnt stay there long ! but had good bit of white wine. thren on to the ball ... lotsa in jokes and what not, but was still ok, was sat at a table with 7 girls ! also, 6 of them were white wine drinkers, so the obvious choice was red ! prob not the best reason now that i ithkn about it...

was food then, lots more drink and a small bit of dancing got thrown out of there bout 12.30/1ish. onto the ivy ! again, full of 12 year olds ! but was still good craic soooo funy walking in somewhere like that dressed in a tux ... people just dont know what to say or do to you. cept some random people were fixing my bow tie for me ! girls of course ! like it's the rowing club and rowing involes a cox .... so the obvious choice was the hilton. cox, paris ! get it !!! anyway ..... by the time we got out of there nad the 2 euro drnks .... me and emsy were just in a state ! Beyond 51st state.

oh was just unreal ! emsy made up stop and pet one of the horses that they have on grafton street ! we talked to wa random welsh guy and i tried to put on a welsh acccent. emsy stop in a newsagent to buy socks ! all these people were talking ot us on grafton street, and i asking were we ata debs and i was liek im 22 !! im not at no debs ! eventually got to nitelink area and then of course got a taxi. i fell asleep in taxi ! woke up next morning ... on way to toilet, parents asked was i ok, i was like yes.... well, no ! and then had a quick chat with god on the big white telephone ... first time in 3 year years

thats about it really ... was dying all day yesterday, work was not even funny ... but was sooo worth it

Now away with ye...

A quantity of quality quotes

Although these quotes pertain to a night in Fi's gaff dated Saturday 22/10/05, they are too good to not post up. Plus I only just found them in my jacket pocket a few minutes ago.

"Fi dropped her drugs! And drugs are baaaaad!" - Col

"That's a big pile o' gee!" - Fi

"Smells like a hot water bottle in here!" - Maria

"LET'S DRINK!" - Maria

"Oh my God my ears ache from the quietness!" - Fi

"If you drink all of that I'll do something good to you." - Grum (directed at Rachel)

"You always like a gilf!" - Fi

"That stuff is devil in a bottle." - Col

"It's not a fucking charity." - Grum (re fat people)

"It's gonna be in a mug. Is that a problem?" - Fi

Fi correcting Rachel during Queen's Don't stop me now:
Rach: "Dynamite..."
Fi: "No!! Fahrenheit!!"

"I don't wanna blah blah blah!" - Fi

"Grum is gonna have a gay son." - Col's prediction for the future

"hskkkfxfkshfx" - Ice dispenser

"Dancin'..." - Rachel

"More ice pleesh" - Rachel

"You sound like you're living in the 80's, Graham." - Fi

"Is it volume-tastic?" - Fi

"i'm not annonymous. I'm COLLEEEEE!" - Col upon seeing this

I also would like to acknowledge the irritative nature of this post to anyone who wasn't there and I realise that all quotes contained herein are painfully 'in-jokes'.

Now away with ye...

Ringfire, Tori Spelling and a girl from Ballinteer

Friday 18th November, 7:00pm and myself and Ali have our asses firmly rooted to a worryingly rickety picnic table outside The Pav. Tis interesting, we muse, that it is so early in the night yet it seems so late. So two Bavarias later we get a call from Lin and Lisa telling us they are inside and far being it from us to form an argument for staying out in the cold November air we wander in. Another couple of Bavarias each and we find ourselves on our way over to see the German in Goldsmith Hall but not before a stop off in Centra for more of the precious Bavaria.

Arriving at Lenny's, it turns out that there is some sort of United Nations drinking session underway with many Germans, a few Dutch and a girl from Ballinteer. The game: Ring of fire aka Circle of death, the object: Get quite drunk, say lots of silly things that aren't actually funny and try not get landed with having to drink the dirty pint. The dirty pint in this case started off with a splash of milk and a dash of vodka to get things going even before any kings were drawn.










The game proceeds with ridiculous rules being made including no pointing and the mandatory use of everybody's surnames. One poor bugger even got landed with a nice pair of dirty pints! A heated debate broke out at one point as to whether somebody had broken the ring or not. It still remains unresolved. Make up your own mind (See photo on left) Curiously, a graphical she-man deck of cards kept appearing throughout the night although nobody seemed brave enough to claim ownership. I have my suspicions - say no more Nickleback. As soon as midnight was upon us, the German had us shipped out of his flat faster than you could say lieblingsfreizeitbeschaeftigung and a lengthy, heated debate ensued, the topic of which was 'Our next port of call'. The aforementioned port of call eventually turned out to be........

..........The Palace. Fine by me although Doyles was infinitely closer. Taxi up was only 2 big ones each and entry was free so nothing to complain about really. Good times had in the palace. Bit of an Andrew's reunion with Robbie G, Laura L and Byron turning up. Highlights included talking to a Dutch Kirsten Dunst, meeting Tori Spelling and enthusing excessively to the girl from Ballinteer about the wonder that is Ska music. Saturday 19th November, 4:00am and myself and Ali have our asses firmly rooted to a worryingly rickety 84N. Vague memories coming back just now of excessive thanking of the driver for getting us home in under 19 minutes. Impressive. After a brief discussion with Ali regarding good kisses and a wrestling match with Rog to get a sleeping bag off him our sleepy heads were lain to rest in anticipation of Part II.


Part II involved taking a bus into town to meet the German & co at Goldsmith. Again, a severe lack of Irish with several Germans, a few Dutch, a Spaniard and a girl from Ballinteer. Ended up in Buskers for a disappointing match against the Aussies in which Ireland lost 14-27. Back to Lennys for some delicious pasta Carbonara and the Wales-South Africa match where the referee, having lost his whistle, was forced to resort to capturing a defenceless bird to poke with a stick in order to simulate the shrill sound of a whistle. Off we are again on the 6 mile hike that is the journey to Frazers of O Connell st. This time it's the Real Madrid - Barcelona match. Alas here the excitement of the last 24 hours caught up with me and that combined with the high temperature and lack of oxygen in Frazers forced my early departure on the 20:10 145 bus. A night cruelly cut short yet one to be remembered. Only one question remains - Who's the girl??!! -->

Now away with ye...

Saturday's match turned pub crawl

This blog is destined to store many random stories that apart from being mildly amusing to a few of the people involved will be quite dull. Nonetheless it will provide me with a means to record the many exciting adventures that seem to find me at every turn. And on that note, Saturday seems like a good place to start. Let me see...

It all started with waiting for an hour for a bus to take me to Mary Macs of Ballsbridge. Although the journey was augmented by the company of Elliot's lovely girlfriend Niamh, the traffic was crap between Donnybrook and Ballsbridge. Nonetheless I finallly arrived at Mary Macs where Sarah and Fi were waiting. More arrived and the match began. What match? Ireland V All blacks. Rather not discuss the result although I don't think Ireland played too badly. Anyway after the game Aily turned up. Say no more about that. She knows I'm sorry.

Then on it was to Burger King on O'Connell St. Took me a while to remember how we got there but I'm pretty sure at this stage it was by bus. After a swift whopper meal it was on to some random pub Lenny the German found to watch Germany V France. Frazers as I am just reminded by Col. Then on again to Parnell Mooney's for some reason to which I am unaware. It was here we met the legendary Scatman John who joined us in an impromptu rendition of Ski-ba-bop-ba-dop-bop. I would also like to take this opportunity to apologise to Fi for opening a letter of hers that clearly was not addressed to me. So anyway this pub attracting the sort of clientel (A certain stuttering old man) that it does we moved swiftly on to....

The Ivy on Harcourt st. Being closed (it was still ridiculously early, about 9.30pm) we headed up to Slapper Face Jacks for a few Britney Spears. It is worth reminding people of Fi's abusive nature at this point. The taxi journey to the Ivy was quite eventful. Fi went into one of her rages hurling abuse through the taxi window at everyone who walked past until... OMG! Total 'mare! She abuses someone she knows who she doesn't recognise till its too late. Bad buzz on Monday morning in college when she saw the person apparently! Abusive comments from Fi included "You're a slut", "Your Ma's a slut" and simply "SLUT!" Needless to say the taxi driver was far from happy as Larry and summed it up himself when he pointed out that Larry is probably not too happy anymore and is probably about ready to kill himself. So its no surprise that heading back to the Ivy after Slappers Fi was refused entry. This is where the group split. With Emsy Col and Aily (sorry) heading into the Ivy, Myself, Nik, Fi, Sarah and the German headed on down to the Mezz.

The band unusually wasn't the best or perhaps the alcohol level in my body prevented me from appreciating them properly. Nothing especially of note happened here although its possible that I simply don't remember. Anybody with a better memory feel free to enlighten us! Also Would love to hear what happened over in the Ivy. Apparently it was full of 12 year olds. The only piece of action I heard from that group was that a drunken staggering smoking Brian O'Driscoll was spotted on Grafton St. with a pair of not so hot looking broads. Personally my night ended with being offered a piece of black pudding on the night link. After politely refusing, the kind Gentleman proceeded to light up. Thanks to Fi, I didn't get knocked unconscious as a result of my protest. Although I paid the price with Fi whining at me all the way home that my house wasn't in town.

Special thanks to Colins impeccable memory, the red people for giving us directions to the Ivy and Aily's bag that relentlessy followed us from pub to pub. Aplogies to Aily generally and to both Aily and Fi for ruining their tops. Additional general apologies to anybody whose clothes were moistened as a result of any of the numerous pint-spilling occasions intiated by me.


Now away with ye...

Doop

Doop. Does anybody remember Doop? I do because they were the first "band" I ever saw to have a song whose name was the same as the band's name from an album of the same. So when it came on MTV it was like: Doop by Doop from Doop. Classic!

Anyway settin up a blog, pickin up ribs. Though I might as well since everyone else is. Will get some good quality literature fired into this bad boy soon enough. Don't have time right now though. In work and the lectures are all finishing up. I have to go and clean the studios then lock up and cycle home.

Thanks for reading!

Now away to ye...